Prayers for Prodigals

Ash Wednesday - February 18, 2026
Week One - Don't Cry

       The first prayer in Banks' book Prayers for Prodigals encourages believers to return to the presence of Jesus. What a simple, yet so very necessary reminder. I think when we get walloped with estrangement, we often get so lost in our own thoughts and emotions that we forget to be in the presence of God. We are angry, we are filled with sorrow, we can't stop crying, and we may even hold thoughts that hold contempt for the gift of our life. We may resent our children, want to distance from others, and even get angry at God for allowing this to happen. My heart and mind certainly weren't in a place to pray, let alone worship. How could I begin to feel peace, or blessing, when my family was rocked by anger, silence, division, and a complete lack of trust? The weight of my estrangement burden got so profound that I felt completely unworthy to be in the presence of the Lord, even if Banks reminded me to. I don't know about you, but no one comes over to my home unless everything is freshly dusted and hints of orange slices and cloves. But Banks reminds us that we do not have wait to be ready to enter God's presence. He reminds us that even in the worst of our emotions, in the middle of the most horrid of situations, He wants us to turn to him. Banks reminds us "When nerves are raw, emotions tense, and schedules overwhelming, we need to go to our rooms, close the door and pray (p. 16)." 

       If I'm being honest, I'm sort of afraid of that room. I don't have a specific prayer room, per se. But I do have a home office and my car. These are pretty much the only two places on earth where I am ever truly alone, far from ear shot from any other human being, where I can let my prayers be audible and honest. Oh, if my dashboard could talk. I often speak out loud in my car, whether I am praying or simply talking to get stuff off of my heart.

       But Banks reminds us to be still and know, to stop putting one foot in front of the other, which is so unusual for parents, particularly moms who have always had to put one foot in front of the other to keep a household running smoothly. Banks encourages us to wait for God, to wait for Him to meet us where we are. But that requires me to be willing, to surrender to the waiting for God to show up in His timing. This requires patience, and it requires a vulnerability to let the God I serve see me as a heart broken mother whose child wants nothing to do with her. This is an unspeakable loss, one that I can barely put words on to even pray for, to even get the courage to pray about. And maybe that's why Banks encourages us to wait. God may know that we are not ready to put words on all of the feelings, to describe all of the circumstances, and to begin to trust anything that relates to love when it feels like love completely failed. But that's why we are encouraged to wait. Because in the waiting, we realize that love didn't fail at all. Love is still here and love is on the way.